RARR: Makie Eats Babies!
by UberNimrod
Summary: Random Act of Random Randomness. Everyone's favorite Baka has made a serious mistake. Eggstra information at the end.


Makie Eats Babies

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Shizuna Minamoto stared at Class 3A in surprise for several seconds.

This wasn't unusual by itself. Class 3A had been known to surprise and shock quite a few teachers over the years.

But this was the first time they had surprised her. She gathered her composure together before she spoke.

"Let me see if I have all of the facts. Two days ago on Saturday I gave each of you an egg and told you to pretend that it was your own baby to take care of and care for. I even encouraged you to name it, and draw a face or something on it as well."

All of the girls nodded.

"And now you are telling me on Monday that a half-dozen of your "babies" have been eaten?"

"I'm really sorry!" Makie bawled.

Shizuna inhaled slowly in an effort to keep her composure yet again. "Please tell me what happened?"

"Well..." Ako started to say.

Chizuru interrupted her, "It was decided that both Ako and myself would offer to be babysitters. We even charged for our services. I figured it would be good practice for when I am in the day care center here."

Shizuna nodded, encouraging Chizuru to continue. "We got a little more business than we had planned on but it was nothing that we could not handle. I knew that several girls would want to be practicing their skills for the Sports Festival, which is why I offered the babysitting service. Ako agreed to help."

Shizuna nodded again while thinking, 'The _real_ reason for this exercise was to demonstrate how difficult it is to take care of a real baby. Especially since several of them have been looking at Negi-sensei in _that_ way. Not that I don't trust Negi-sensei to be a gentleman, but...'

Chizuru continued, "Eight girls had left their... "Babies" in our care. I encouraged Ako to treat them like real babies. Checking on them every few minutes, cuddling them if they were crying, and so on."

Ako nodded and added, "Chizuru would pick a random "baby" and tell me that it was crying, or that it needed to be changed, or something else. It was something to simulate being a maternity nurse, which I will have to do if I continue on with my training to be a nurse."

Shizuna glanced at Ako and said, "I had to do the same."

Chizuru resumed speaking, "I went up the hallway to see if two girls had returned from their practice yet, and Ako had gone to the bathroom when Makie returned from her practice. I came back to the room to find Makie cooking eggs with rice."

"Eggs are a source of protein, even if they are loaded with cholesterol. You taught us that." Makie said.

Shizuna had to admit to herself that she had taught them that. Then something clicked in her mind.

"Didn't you notice the eggs had been marked up?" she asked Makie.

Makie looked at the ground sheepishly as she answered, "I usually mark the eggs we buy with frowny faces since eating too many of them is bad. There was a study in the United States recently that said high cholesterol is linked to increased risk of breast cancer. So I didn't notice the markings on the other eggs."

Ako added, "She does do that. It is her way of reminding herself not to eat too many. Some of us have teased her about making them depressed because their lives were soon to end."

Shizuna sighed. She hadn't expected this at all. Although she knew Makie was a little concerned about the size of her breasts. She certainly had other students that were more obsessed than Makie about that. But Makie's blunder was the first of this sort she had experienced. She gathered up her composure again before asking, "So whose eggs did Makie eat? Raise your hand."

Ako, Akira, Yuna, Misora, and Konoka raised their hands. After another second, Setsuna raised her hand also.

Shizuna was surprised again by the hands. She glanced at Konoka and asked, "I know everyone else is doing something for the Festival. Kuzunoha-sensei mentioned to me that Setsuna-san was going to perform a demonstration for the Kendo club, but why did you hire a babysitter?"

"So I could go and watch Set-chan practice," Konoka said. Setsuna's face started to redden when she said that.

Shizuna carefully ignored it. She inhaled before saying, "I have dealt with dropped "babies" before, but this is a first I believe. Let me find some more eggs to give everyone, and we will discuss this further on Saturday."

Everyone nodded as Shizuna left the room. She stood outside the classroom briefly, as she needed to adjust her shoe. When she straightened up, the conversation resumed in the classroom.

"See? I told you Minamoto-sensei wouldn't be too upset," Makie's voice said.

"Grandfather was still laughing when I left the room after telling him," Konoka's voice said. Shizuna had never heard Konoka sound quite like that though.

"If we fail because of this Makie..." Ako's voice said. Shizuna noted that Ako's voice sounded almost as threatening as Konoka's voice.

She decided to leave the area before she overheard more. Let Makie suffer what she will.

* * *

Nimrod Notes

For those that do not understand, as a part of Sex Education in some schools, teachers will typically give students something to demonstrate the burden of having to take care of a baby, in an effort to cut down on teenage pregnancies. Some schools will give the students a doll that will cry at random intervals. Poorer schools will just give the students an egg or a five-pound bag of flour to carry around at all times to impress upon young minds the added "weight" of responsibility.

For the record, this is a recent thing that schools have adopted. I was out of high school before this sort of thinking got started. Either that or my school was too small to do anything of the sort.

After I wrote the first version of this story, I saw Fox News reporting about the new study linked high cholesterol with increased risk of breast cancer. Considering that Makie is shown to be concerned about the size of her breasts... It felt natural to include that tidbit of data into the story.


End file.
